025- (Voice) Also, I turned your inmate into a cat...

[uberboned]

I figure me bein' kinda new to this whole thing means this is old hat by now, but seriously? I don't think meaningful progress gets made if you keep resettin' people's brains. Maybe I'm completely outta line here, but that sounds kinda counterproductive, but, hey, what do I know? I'm just the guy who's been workin' this angle since the dawn of creation.

Whatever. I'm back. The Great Outdoors are not as great as previously advertised, but it was kinda worth it, 'cause I'm sure Irene'll be pickin' sticks out of her hair for the next week and, hopefully, she learned something from all that. Unless, of course, the Admiral thinks I'm not doin' my job properly and erases her memory. 'Cause nothing like making a breakthrough just to have it blown up in your face. Yep! Smells like job satisfaction to me.

[Gabe's a little twitchy about the memory loss thing. CAN YOU TELL? It's not even just the fact that it's JD and Dean (and Max and Shawn are still unaccounted for). IT'S THE FACT THAT THE ADMIRAL CAN FUCK WITH PEOPLE THAT ROYALLY AND SCREW HIM OVER TO BOOT. Yeah. Gabe? Don't approve of these shenanigans that he can't control. Wah. Poor angel. Blah, blah, blah.]

Comments

[bargemods.livejournal.com]

I know that I-- quite rightfully-- appear intimidatingly powerful to the lot of you, but here I thought you were all intelligent enough to realize that I have no control over your memories.

Oh, the odd thing happens now and then with flood waters, but I don't make any of it happen.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[GDI, Admiral. Just let Gabe bitch about you behind your back like a normal mysterious being. :|

LALALALA NOT TAUNTING THE ADMIRAL. LALALALA.

He'll just be all, "LEARN TO DRIVE BETTER, ASSHOLE" in his head.

Because that's totally mature conflict resolution.

Yep.]

[gotgreenmagic.livejournal.com]

Boo hoo, working is hard. Let me go find you the world's smallest violin.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Hm. That's about a 6.1 for style and about a -4 for originality. Nice try, though.

[gotgreenmagic.livejournal.com]

Just making an observation, slick. And in case you've not noticed, you don't have a whole lot of room to talk given the whole 'near-omnipotent being whining about minor setbacks' bit.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

A minor setback is an Inmate backsliding after you got 'em just where you wanted 'em, princess. It ain't endin' up back on Square One. But hey, I guess if it's not my inmate, it's not really my problem.

[EXCEPT WHERE GABE HAS ISSUES TAKING THINGS PERSONALLY, APPARENTLY.]

[yousethimfree.livejournal.com]

It's worse when it happens to wardens. [Or HINTHINT, MAX'LL PROBABLY COME BACK LIKE THAT.]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[jkasa NOT THINKING OF THAT. NOT THINKING OF THAT.]

If that ever happens to me... Punch me in the jaw. I won't remember why you're punching me, but if I'm not better than this boat, then I'll deserve it.

[yousethimfree.livejournal.com]

Whatever you say, Gabby.

[Private]

[sonotahunter.livejournal.com]

And how is that any different than what you do?

[Private]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

I don't do anything without a damn good reason.

[Private]

[sonotahunter.livejournal.com]

Your reasoning, whatever it is, must be strongly slanted toward the ridiculous.

[Private]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Now what makes you say that?

[tadwizard.livejournal.com]

Great for teaching people to give a shit about each other. 'Yeah, you have to reform and learn to form emotional bonds and care about others, but by the way? They might just randomly forget who you are after getting to know them for a year.'

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Way to instill a sense of camaraderie into the boat.

[video]

[hulk]

Yeah, that. That doesn't really make any sense, any way you cut it.

But sorry that you didn't have fun with your whole camping trip.

[video]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Pfft. I wouldn't say it wasn't fun. Watching Irene flail is hilarious..

[video]

[hulk]

...Oh. That's, uh. Well, not nice, maybe, but. Um.

[video]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[Gabe is giving you a a look, Bruce. A look that suggests you are really too much of a sweetheart to exist.]

....And?

[video]

[hulk]

[Hey, Bruce recognizes that look! He gets it a lot! 8DDD]

...Just. Just never mind.

[video]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Who stole your spine and how much money did they get for it?

[video]

[hulk]

I nev- Very funny. [Nice recovery, Bruce. Niiiiiice.]

[video]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

No. Really. If I got on Ebay right now, would I find "Bruce Banner's spine?"

[video]

[hulk]

No, my spine is not for any kind of sale on eBay or anywhere else, okay.

[video]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

So you've never woken up in a tub of ice somewhere, wondering what happened to your backbone? You just never had one, to begin with.

[video]

[hulk]

...No, not in a tub of ice, no. And you know. Just being nice doesn't mean I lack a spine.

[video]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

No. Having no spine means you lack a spine.

[video]

[hulk]

And how am I lacking in spine. Exactly.

Re: [video]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

I've just called you spineless, like, seven times now and all you've done is go, "STOPPIT." That's how. I've seen kittens look more threatening than you.

[video]

[hulk]

Hey, I didn't realize there was a whole. Richter scale of responding to spineless jabs. [...Bruce, your attempt at sarcasm is entirely negated by the nerd factor of that particular barb.]

Re: [video]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

....No. Keep going. I wanna see how far you spiral out of control before you hit critical and explode.

[video]

[hulk]

How do I keep g- I'm not even doing anything but sitting here and talking, there's no exploding of any kind going on, or any exploding coming in the near future.

[video]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[GABE LOOKS LIKE HE HAS GLEEFULLY DISCOVERED SOMETHING.]

HAH! And there it is!

[video]

[hulk]

[AND BRUCE JUST LOOKS LIKE HE'S CONFUSED.]

Where's what? There's- What are you even talking about?

[video]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

If you have to ask, you'll never know.

[AND HE ENDS THE TRANSMISSION. ENJOY YOUR CONFUSION, BRUCIE.]

[video]

[hulk]

[THAT WILL NOT STOP BRUCE BANNER, GABE. HE R STUBBORN DETERMINED, IF CONFUSED.]

No, no, wait! That's always been a ridiculous answer to anything, because at some past point, everything had to be asked, because there was always a point where you don't know anything, so. What are you talking about?

[video]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[AND THE VIDEO FLICKS BACK ON.]

You're a dork. That's what I'm talkin' about.

[TRANSMISSION. ENDED.]

[video]

[hulk]

...What, that's it?

[video]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[And back on it goes just so Gabe can look ANNOYED.]

Yep.

[OFF.]

[video]

[hulk]

But. That's kind of a given. I mean, I sort of figured that whole thing out in high school. What with the whole, uh. [Don't say swirlies, Bruce, don't say swirlies, don't say swirlies.] ...Learning experience there.

Re: [video]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[HE'S JUST IGNORING YOU NOW BRUCE. YOU GET NOTHING BUT A BLACK SCREEN.]

[always-thewoman.livejournal.com]

Glad to know my suffering brings you so much pleasure, warden of mine.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

You just need to lighten up a little, Irene.

A CRACK AT CIVILITY.

[always-thewoman.livejournal.com]

You are graced with the luxury of having the whole of creation as your own private joke. The rest of us have not been so blessed.








Has that... friend - of yours turned up in the interim?

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Yeah? I guess it's easy to think that, huh?

...Nope. Not yet.

[HE'S FIIIINE. TOTALLY. YUP.]

Tell superfriends i want to chat but have a ton of neglected spring break homework. <3 all.

[always-thewoman.livejournal.com]

You don't exactly encourage anyone to think otherwise.

Thank you for the 'fungal experience', by the way. I do love being made a complete fool of.

Oh, so I still have you all to myself. Goody.

[Sarcasm, just dripping allll over this message. Your inmate's a gem, Gabe.]

OKAY! <33

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Maybe not, but that don't mean that's all there is to it, but what do I know? I'm just an archangel. I lord my superiority over everyone.

C'mon! It's not like anyone was ever gonna see you besides me! And, for the record? You just admitted you acted like an ass on mushrooms- I didn't tell anyone. So there.

THANK YOU DARLING. Also, like Bela, Irene does not know wtf to do with kindness. Also FUCK, HOMEWORK

[always-thewoman.livejournal.com]

For once, you've found something on which we can agree.

You - what?

Do you honestly expect me to believe that you kept that hilarious anecdote to yourself? Why would you do that?

And here I thought having a laugh at others' expense was your favorite past-time. Perhaps you're losing your touch, Feathers.

</ mad unsettled>

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Yeah, but enjoying other people's well-deserved misery and then making fun of 'em behind their backs for it is a dick move even I wouldn't pool. I may be an ass, but I've got standards, princess.