Those guys are either gonna dust you or use you as bait.

Day Two of No-Really-I-Died-That-Time-And-It-Sucked Death Toll. Still sucks.

Note to self: Find a constructive hobby. One that doesn't involve getting lit on fire.

[Warden Filter]

Someone needs to check Bela Talbot's room. She had to have broken into my stash to get the holy oil, so if she's still got some, I wanna know about it. And I want it gone.

( Bonus spam for Max )

[Gabe sounds a little too calm. It's that saccharine calm edge he gets when he's starting to get so unbelievably pissed that he might snap and strangle something in the next ten minutes.]

Okay. Here's a game everyone can play! The rules are simple.

If you hear a hellhound, call me. I'll deal with it. If everything you're throwing at it don't seem to be working, then maybe it's 'cause they don't respond to much of anything except divine intervention. Most of 'em should be gone by now, but there were stragglers and for all I know, they're crafty little sons of bitches.

And, Irene? Sweetheart? The next time I tell you to do something, don't give me lip.

Hey, Barge. Did you hear? It's been quiet. Too quiet.

I just thought you all should know that, 'cause I'm sure if someone doesn't say it every ten seconds, it'll lose its effect or something.

[Private to Irene]

Congratulations, princess! You've won a free lesson in humility! I'm sure you're wondering what that means. Well, I'm gonna tell you, but first I gotta ask you one simple question.

How do you feel about food service?

Please note that your answer will not actually affect my decision.

[The audio link clicks on and the Barge gets treated to THIS. Don't make the mistake of assuming this means Gabe is a cultured, immature son of a bitch. He probably only knows it as the Alcoholic's Anonymous theme song. Eventually, Gabe starts talking over it.]

So, apparently, the first step to eternal life is you have to die. Great mantra here, guys, considering you're already dead, but whatever. And if anyone asks you if you know Tyler Durden, just say no.

That said, I don't do rigorous structure and I'm chompin' at the bit to put half of you in fun situations you don't wanna be in and probably won't find nearly as fun as I will, but I'm resisting, 'cause I occasionally use this little thing called restraint. Look it up. Some of you need better dictionaries. Do I need to start a five step program here? 'Cause I gotta tell you, one of those steps is "make amends," not "make a mess of the mens." Glad I could clear that up for you. You're welcome.

That said, if any of you putzes start fight clubbing it up anywhere near my level, I'm gonna forget that I'm actively Not Involved in this bullshit and happily put you through a wall and leave your Wardens to deal with your bruised asses. Just a tip.

And yes, JD is with me. And no, I'm not corrupting his delicate youthful sensibilities. Geez.

[OOC: Gabe's pretty much had it with you people and due to the fact that his KNEEJERK reaction to this kind of thing is to start dishing out just desserts all around and that would exacerbate the situation and he's fully capable of REALIZING that, since he can't just run off and leave the chaos to someone else, he's mostly staying in his room and being agitated. But yeah, if anyone causes problems near his level, REST ASSURED THERE WILL BE ONE PISSED-OFF ARCHANGEL GUNNING FOR YOUR COLLARBONES. This is not even the kind of chaos he likes, dudes.]