001 (Voice)

Feb. 5th, 2010 06:29 pm
uberboned: (Cocky)
[personal profile] uberboned
[While the Winchesters are away, the Tricksters will play, apparently. THE BARGE HAS TIMING. :| Hope your ears love the sultry sound of loud-mouthed demigods/archangels with slight southern drawls, residents of the Barge, because that's what you're getting. And there is nothing in the tone of this that does not scream SNARK.]

GOOD MORNIN', VIET-NAM.

Or afternoon. Or, for all I know, half-past midnight. I don't believe in clocks. Anyway. 

Hi! I'm the newest sherrif on this Love Boat. One of you lucky sons of bitches will eventually be mine to mold into whatever amounts to a productive, functional member of society. Lucky you! For the rest of you, juuust get used to the sound of this voice, kids, 'cause you're gonna be hearing a lot of it. 

I could go on, tell you all a few things about me, and we can all have a nice, little sharing circle, buuuut I'm not that kinda guy. Sorry. A man's gotta have a little mystery about him. In this case, a lot. 

But, hey, I'm here for all you losers. That's the deal I made and I live up to my deals. Think of me as your own personal pagan deity. So if you really need and/or want me, look me up sometime. It's Trickster, comma, the. Thank you and good night. 

[Spam]

Date: 2010-02-07 04:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yousethimfree.livejournal.com
[And she laughs. Actually laughs.] Cause it. I just try to stay out of zero, and on occasion protect the few people on this tin can I actually care about.
Edited Date: 2010-02-07 04:38 am (UTC)

[Spam]

Date: 2010-02-07 04:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] painhumbles.livejournal.com
And I'm a Warden, so they expect me to be, y'know, a decent member of society. [He is trying so hard to be innocent and serious right now.

And then he bursts out laughing.]

Yeah, right.

[Spam]

Date: 2010-02-07 05:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yousethimfree.livejournal.com
Ya know, I was considering holding this angel thing over your head, but now...
From: [identity profile] painhumbles.livejournal.com
[LOOK AT THIS GRIN, RUBY? HOW CAN YOU RESIST THIS MF-ING GRIN.]

But now you're utterly charmed by my winning personality? [Spreads his arms wide in his best shameless "I KNOW, I AM AWESOME" gesture.] It happens to the best. And I promise I won't go all angel all over your ass, so that's probably a better deal than you get from most of the family.

[THE ANGELS ARE LIKE THE MAFIA, DIDN'T YOU KNOW?]

[Spam: Pft. Crackville is fun.]

Date: 2010-02-07 06:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yousethimfree.livejournal.com
Yeah, well, mine's no bed of roses either. [She licks her lips as they start to approach the bar.] Although, there was this one thing I thought about getting out of you...

[Go on, Gabby, ask. THE MUN DARES YOU.]

Re: [Spam: It's my hometown, yo. Represent.]

Date: 2010-02-07 06:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] painhumbles.livejournal.com
[CURIOUS GABE IS NOW CURIOUS. And has forgotten there was a bar or he'd be making comments about how this sounds like the beginning of a bad joke. Gabriel is the Dean Winchester of the angel hierarchy.]

...Okay. I'll bite. What is it?
From: [identity profile] yousethimfree.livejournal.com
[And yet they get along SO WELL. How does that work?

And Ruby gives him one of those looks. You know which one. Yeah, that one she used to give Sam to make him all cute and flustered.]
From: [identity profile] painhumbles.livejournal.com
[Because Gabe could get along with a brick wall. It's like the full circle of doucheyness. "OH MY GOD, YOU'RE OBNOXIOUS AND I HATE YOU... No, actually, you're adorable. Please say more words." And then he puts you in a time loop FOR YOUR OWN GOOD.

Gabe doesn't get all flustered. He orchestrates orgies. With cake. He lost his shame somewhere between Heaven and Albuquerque. He just raises an eyebrow.]

Not usually, but I slept through that part of angel school. [He ducks into the bar and then pokes his head out the door to add.] Not that I do all that much sleeping, if you catch my drift. [And he's ducking back in now.

CHEW ON THAT, RUBY.]
Edited Date: 2010-02-07 07:38 am (UTC)

[Spam: LOL.]

Date: 2010-02-07 07:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yousethimfree.livejournal.com
[Mmmm, orgies with cake. Chocolate cake? If it is, Ruby is so there.

She follows him in, of course.]

It's just been too long since I did something really wrong, ya know, and I figure you're plenty wrong.
From: [identity profile] painhumbles.livejournal.com
[WHAT HEATHEN GOD HAS ORGIES WITH ANYTHING ELSE? Not this heathen god, that's for sure.

He's already surveying the bar, staking out the alcohol that's likely to create something ungodly sweet and probably vaguely girly. Gabe is very certain of his masculinity.]

I'm the definition of wrong. If Cas were still here, he'd fall over in a fit if he knew half the things I've done. [He looks her over.] ...Although, if he actually got along with you, someone must've yanked that stick out of his ass.
From: [identity profile] yousethimfree.livejournal.com
[NPC!Elf knows what she likes, so she doesn't have to ask for her Jack. Not that she's really picky, alcohol is alcohol.]

He didn't at first, at least not when he was a warden. Then he rattled off something about your dad and disappeared. Next thing we know he's back, only five years older, human and high as a kite.
From: [identity profile] painhumbles.livejournal.com
[Yes, get the masculine drink, Ruby. GABE WILL DRINK HIS LITTLE BLUE THING WITH MANLY PRIDE. And it better have an umbrella. Oh yes.

And now he's gonna stare like Ruby be crazy.]

...How come I don't get drugged-up!Castiel. I get stick-up-his-ass, disapproves-of-everything!Castiel. [Eyeroll and now he's just muttering, BECAUSE NO ONE EVER LISTENS TO HIM.] I told 'em he wasn't gonna find Dad.

[Spam: It's cool, I make up words all the time.]

Date: 2010-02-07 08:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yousethimfree.livejournal.com
He wasn't just drugged up. [She holds up her right hand, flashing her awesome black diamond snake ring (http://www.myjewelrybox.com/?section=item&itemID=6233) at him.] Christmas present. How fuckin' weird is that?

[Spam: We can have our own dictionary.]

Date: 2010-02-07 02:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] painhumbles.livejournal.com
[He's gonna borrow your hand for a second Ruby.]

Okay. Castiel got hardcore and I missed it? That son of a bitch better loosen up by the time I get back home or I'm gonna have to take matters into my own hands. Make the little schmuck embrace his inner hardass.

[And now you can have your hand back.]

[Spam: What shall we call it?]

Date: 2010-02-07 11:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yousethimfree.livejournal.com
I think it happened when the fam took off and left him. He didn't really say.

[Spam: The Dictionary.. Of Awesome People.]

Date: 2010-02-08 12:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] painhumbles.livejournal.com
[Thoughtful Gabe is thoughtful and internally miserable.] Yeah, well. That's the family for you.

[OH HEY, HOW ABOUT A SUBJECT CHANGE. ZERO TO ANNOYING IN NO TIME FLAT.]

Do you always pick up angels on prison ships or was this just one of those special occasions and Cas was a freakish, drug-addicted fluke?

[Spam: AWESOME.]

Date: 2010-02-08 02:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yousethimfree.livejournal.com
Not many, as far as I know. Aziraphale is the only other one I'm aware of.

Re: [Spam]

Date: 2010-02-08 02:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] painhumbles.livejournal.com
That guy. The Remedial Heaven angel. I talked to him. ...Very British. And apparently got stuck with Alastair. My heart weeps for him. [He clutches his heart a little. Yeah, you can feel his agony.]

Re: [Spam]

Date: 2010-02-08 03:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yousethimfree.livejournal.com
[Ruby grins at him.] He can take it.

[Spam]

Date: 2010-02-08 04:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] painhumbles.livejournal.com
Well, he's not a trembling heap in the corner, so that puts him light years ahead of half the people that have gone through Al's House of Pain. I can respect that.

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Gabriel, aka The Trickster

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