IC CONTACT POST

[uberboned]

[A woman's voice comes over the line.]

You've reached the Trickster's voicemail. Unfortunately, Mr. Trickster isn't available to take your call, nor will he likely ever be. Should you still wish to leave a message, please respond after the tone, and maybe we'll remember to get it to him, mmkay?

[Beep]

[[OOC: This is an IC voicemail post for all verses games. Please put the name of the verse/game you want in the subject heading.]]

Comments

[hexyoutotuesday.livejournal.com]

You don't see me throwing myself off a building, do you? [She was dead serious on that one.]

No. There's only one, and Doctor D called me today to tell me that [she swallows hard] she is doing just fine.

[And that's how Gabriel found out he was having a daughter.]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[And that was how Gabriel figured out that there is nothing in the world that can cause an angel to faint from shock even if it would have been appropriate at this moment.]

I, uh... She? [His voice never used to squeak like that.]

[hexyoutotuesday.livejournal.com]

[Jinx covers her face with both hands, exhaling shakily.]

We're going to have a house will a tall tower with no door so she can never leave. I'm praying she has nothing but your genetics. Your weight problems, your bad skin, your hairline...

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[Gabriel bites his knuckles and goes eerily silent for a few moments before...]

....I'll go buy a shotgun. Just in case.

[hexyoutotuesday.livejournal.com]

[Jinx sits up, forehead in her hand.]

I want a new one. Do-over. I cannot deal with a girl. I can't. I can't even deal with anything under the age of eight, how the hell am I gonna do this?

Second thoughts. I'm definitely having second thoughts.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

I have a hard time seeing you with a daughter- I mean, it's a Joan Crawford situation just waiting to happen.

[hexyoutotuesday.livejournal.com]

Seeing me with a daughter? [She gives him a look.]

Ahiru has you running around in circles. Our little abomination's going to have you whipped more than I could ever dream of.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

....You forgot Maya. She's just more low-maintenance. [Facefall. Damn, he is a sucker for a little girl.]

And we're never getting a cat. Nothing that even vaguely resembles a cat. If the kid goes near something cat-like, I'm gonna lose it.

[...Oh wait. He's talking like they're keeping it. Fuckberries.]

[hexyoutotuesday.livejournal.com]

Either a reference just went right over my head or you're just talking like that because you're in shock.

[She motions for him to sit down next to her.]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[He flops down unceremoniously. Kyubey apparently ilicits this reaction.] Ahiru's contract's held by some demonic self-cannibalizing cat freak that will not die.

[hexyoutotuesday.livejournal.com]

[She leans her head on his shoulder.]

I find the term "cat freak" racist and derogatory.

[She sighs.] How many times did you try killing it?

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

It was definitely not your soul brother, so you can rest easy. [He huffs at that and holds up five fingers.]

Five. I had to stop because it was getting close to midnight and I was worried what damage letting it eat itself after that could do.

[hexyoutotuesday.livejournal.com]

[Jinx takes his hand and kisses the tip of every one of those fingers.]

That sounds horrible. Do you know why Ahiru made a contract with this thing?

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

To keep everyone safe and happy. [He can't even do a passable imitation of a pre-teen girl, but he can make his voice high and girly.] I tried to give her the free will speech, but she was having none of it. And I think she hates me now... Except she doesn't hate anyone, so it's really complicated.

[He sighs and wraps his other hand around hers.] I'm not really that good a paternal figure- I haven't exactly been the greatest older brother all these years and then there's that whole 'absent Dad' thing... I mean, look how bad the Winchesters are screwed up.

[hexyoutotuesday.livejournal.com]

Damn it, Ahiru. [She growls and shakes her head.] I'll try talking to her. I am her mentor. Or something.

[She sighs and looks down at their connected hands.]

Well, you've got one thing going for you. There's no way in hell I'm letting you run away from this one. If you so much as try, I'll find you... [Looking back up, she gives him her best serious mobster face.] And I will make you pay>

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

And I wouldn't want that. I've seen your dungeon. [He pouted a little and then kissed her nose.] I'm gonna miss your dungeon.

[hexyoutotuesday.livejournal.com]

Where in the book does it say I have to bequeath the dungeon? [She glares, crinkling her nose.]

I am never giving up my rights to tie you up and break out the leather.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Do they make maternity dominatrix outfits? [He wrinkles his nose right at her] We could have just invented a new kink.

[Annnd that just makes him snort] This kid is gonna be so screwed up.

[hexyoutotuesday.livejournal.com]

[Groaning, she rolls her eyes and lets go of his hand. But it's not long before she straddles his lap, draping her arms over his shoulders.]

We didn't. Believe me. It already exists.

[A frown.] Our sex life aside, she's going to have it rough. No matter what. I've been....praying that she looks more like you than me. [Legitimately praying.]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

There really is a kink for everything. Sex was the original iPhone. [And he is not complaining one bit about Jinx in his lap. Nope. In fact, he leans back a bit.

At that comment, he kisses her on the forehead and then down to the tip of her nose.] I like how you look. And she should have your eyes.

[Dammit, Gabriel. You are really losing this fight.]

[hexyoutotuesday.livejournal.com]

No, no, no, no, no. My little girl is not having cat jokes made at her for the rest of her life.

[Her little girl. This was weird. Really, really weird. Her nose crinkles at that kiss and she pouts at him.]

I want her to have everything I never did. Like a tan.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Okay. Ixnay on your features, which look damn good on you, by the way. [He kisses her on the neck.] Just don't become one of those creepy pageant moms.

[hexyoutotuesday.livejournal.com]

[She muffles a groan by biting her bottom lip as he kisses her neck.]

Don't worry. I'll be worse. I'll dress her in costumes and make her study The Art of War. [Grabbing him lightly by the back of his head, she presses his lips back up against her neck.]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

She's gonna beat Drew Barrymore for most dysfunctional girl still wearing ribbons in her hair. [His voice is muffled by his lips on her neck, but the words are clear enough between kissing and sucking.]

[hexyoutotuesday.livejournal.com]

Then she'll be the only girl going into kindergarten with a pediatrician, a therapist, and a support group. [Which she said while panting and swallowing. Her hand fists in his hair and she grabs one of his shoulders. Head tilting back, she exposes more neck for him.]

Every kid wants to be unique, right?