Those guys are either gonna dust you or use you as bait.

[He flops down unceremoniously. Kyubey apparently ilicits this reaction.] Ahiru's contract's held by some demonic self-cannibalizing cat freak that will not die.

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[She leans her head on his shoulder.]

I find the term "cat freak" racist and derogatory.

[She sighs.] How many times did you try killing it?

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It was definitely not your soul brother, so you can rest easy. [He huffs at that and holds up five fingers.]

Five. I had to stop because it was getting close to midnight and I was worried what damage letting it eat itself after that could do.

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[Jinx takes his hand and kisses the tip of every one of those fingers.]

That sounds horrible. Do you know why Ahiru made a contract with this thing?

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To keep everyone safe and happy. [He can't even do a passable imitation of a pre-teen girl, but he can make his voice high and girly.] I tried to give her the free will speech, but she was having none of it. And I think she hates me now... Except she doesn't hate anyone, so it's really complicated.

[He sighs and wraps his other hand around hers.] I'm not really that good a paternal figure- I haven't exactly been the greatest older brother all these years and then there's that whole 'absent Dad' thing... I mean, look how bad the Winchesters are screwed up.

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Damn it, Ahiru. [She growls and shakes her head.] I'll try talking to her. I am her mentor. Or something.

[She sighs and looks down at their connected hands.]

Well, you've got one thing going for you. There's no way in hell I'm letting you run away from this one. If you so much as try, I'll find you... [Looking back up, she gives him her best serious mobster face.] And I will make you pay>

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[SHE STILL DOESN'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU. But this is necessary.]

i need it cleansed

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Does the darkness in your Faberge soul affect your ability to talk?

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it's not a whatever you said egg

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I hope you don't expect me to do this by chanting Enochian via text message.

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can you come over?

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Gimme me three seconds.

[ANNNNND then there was a Gabriel in Phancyhive. Considering how often he trolls and dotes on the residents here, you'd think he'd have been here before, but.... Nope.]

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[She's in her room when he magically poofs in. Sup.]

Hi, Gabriel.

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And I wouldn't want that. I've seen your dungeon. [He pouted a little and then kissed her nose.] I'm gonna miss your dungeon.

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Where in the book does it say I have to bequeath the dungeon? [She glares, crinkling her nose.]

I am never giving up my rights to tie you up and break out the leather.

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[Gabriel shoves his hands in his pockets and gives her an awkward nod.] You still have your vocal chords. Good. Wouldn't want you bartering off anything else on me.

[A beat] Still mad at me?

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Do they make maternity dominatrix outfits? [He wrinkles his nose right at her] We could have just invented a new kink.

[Annnd that just makes him snort] This kid is gonna be so screwed up.

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I wouldn't unless I knew it was a good idea!

Yes. [Though she sounds more disappointed than anything else, really.]

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Okay. Since you're still "mad" at me, I'll keep the smartass comment to myself, and won't call Trancy in for your intervention. [He holds out a hand.] Gimme the thingy.

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He... already talked to me about it. [She slips a ring off her finger and puts it in his hand. Surprise, her soul is constantly changing forms in addition to being trapped inside something! Then, hesitantly:]

Don't break it.

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[Groaning, she rolls her eyes and lets go of his hand. But it's not long before she straddles his lap, draping her arms over his shoulders.]

We didn't. Believe me. It already exists.

[A frown.] Our sex life aside, she's going to have it rough. No matter what. I've been....praying that she looks more like you than me. [Legitimately praying.]

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There really is a kink for everything. Sex was the original iPhone. [And he is not complaining one bit about Jinx in his lap. Nope. In fact, he leans back a bit.

At that comment, he kisses her on the forehead and then down to the tip of her nose.] I like how you look. And she should have your eyes.

[Dammit, Gabriel. You are really losing this fight.]

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Your contracting kitty-friend already gave me that speech after I stabbed him five times. [He cringes and gives her a sheepish look.] He got better... And got four Chinese dinners out of it. Eesh.

[He studied the ring in his hand, frowning at the corruption in it before covering his hand over it and murmuring in some archaic language. The tips of his fingers glowed with an opalescent pearly light and when he pulled his hand away, the gem seemed healthier and brighter... Gabriel on the other hand looked mildly ill. There... Might be a reason those things are better left to grief seeds. He shook it off and then handed the ring back to her.]

How did it go with Alois anyway?

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Qua-?! Y-Y-You did what?

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