002 (Voice, because Gabe likes hearing himself talk)

[uberboned]

[This week is a week for violent altercations and today is a day for filtering posts AWAY from people you don't wanna talk to. In this case, SO VERY FILTERED AWAY FROM PEOPLE NAMED WINCHESTER. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. AND GABE DOESN'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU.]

So. Barge.

Let's recap. That's... What? Three attacks in as many days? Is that the lull-breaking tradition here on the USS Redemption? Kill each other until the boredom goes away? 

Nice tactic, you psychos. Sorta defeats the purpose of the damn boat, don't it? 

Comments

[hyposprayed.livejournal.com]

Yeah, we all came aboard a virtual prison ship expecting peace and quiet.

If you think this is bad you have a hell of a lot to learn about the Barge.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Oh, I've seen worse. Believe me. I'm just stepping back and appreciating the irony of the situation.

[hyposprayed.livejournal.com]

Hell, what do you expect? People don't come here willingly and the past few months weren't exactly a cake walk for wardens and inmates alike. If anything I'd call it inevitable, though if these thick headed morons send anymore people our way that's another damn story. Infirmary's been crowded enough the last weeks.

Judas soooo shouldn't be talking to Gabe.

[heavenonthemind.livejournal.com]

Three attacks?

BUT HE'S A PAGAN GOD. REALLY. :| ....That doesn't make it better.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

That I've counted. Unless there were more that didn't make the evening news, but the way this junker gossips, I think we'd be hearing all the gory details by now.

Hahahaha. Judas is just a little coward.

[heavenonthemind.livejournal.com]

More?

The big bad archangel is scared of the Winchesters. He's in good company.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Like I said, not that I've counted. I'm giving it another day and see if everything goes to hell in a very bloody handbasket. Then again, I'm new here. Apparently, this is normal.

:]

[heavenonthemind.livejournal.com]

...again? It's going to happen again?

:]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

I DON'T KNOW. I JUST GOT HERE.

You're a twitchy little ferret, aren'tcha, bucko?

[heavenonthemind.livejournal.com]

I'm not twitchy. I have reason to be afraid of the people here.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

So you're.. Just twitchy and have a good reason for it.

So... What? Did the inmates hold you down and steal your lunch money or something?

[heavenonthemind.livejournal.com]

I'm not twitchy.

HARK THE DICKISH ANGELS SIIIIING.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[He may have just manifested a thesaurus.]

Keyed up, edgy, nervous, touchy, uneasy, all wound up... Any of those doin' it for you?

LET'S JUST ALL DO OUR OWN THING

[heavenonthemind.livejournal.com]

[Oh Gabe. You tricky dick.]

I have reasons to be uneasy or nervous.

DOOM ON EARTH AND DOUCHERY WILD

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Annnd I didn't dispute that. Just making an observation, bucko.

GABE ENJOYS HIS SALSA MILD. (lolfail on my part)

[heavenonthemind.livejournal.com]

My name isn't bucko.

gdi I want salsa now.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

It's a term of endearment, but if you're gonna uppity, fine. Who am I talking to right now?

Sorry bb. :c

[heavenonthemind.livejournal.com]

My name isn't important.

IT'S OKAY. I FOUND SOME. The fridge is a cave of wonders.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Then I guess you can't really expect me to call you anything else, huh, kiddo?

IS ROBIN WILLIAMS IN THERE? I MEAN. THE GENIE?

[heavenonthemind.livejournal.com]

Judas. Judas Iscariot.

I THINK HE'S HIDING BEHIND THE LEFTOVER PIZZA BOXES. :|

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[And this is where the transmission cuts off, because Gabe has to laugh himself into a coma, brb.

SORRY, JUDAS.]

THAT'S SO RAD. OMG.

[heavenonthemind.livejournal.com]

[You make Judas sadface. All over the place.]

[wichita-kansas.livejournal.com]

I think you need a job.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[FEEL THE BITCHFACE, WICHITA. FEEEL IT.]

What? Being the most charming son of a bitch on this boat ain't good enough?

SHE CAN FEEL HIS ANGELIC BITCHFACE FROM LEVEL ZERO.

[wichita-kansas.livejournal.com]

Well, sure, for a human, but you're some sort of supernatural douchebag, right? So can't you multitask and help us peons out?

IT'S A REALLY POWERFUL BITCHFACE.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

I could.

[You get the benefit of a long, long thoughtful pause here, because Gabe is a BRAT.]

SHE'S FEARLESS... NOT.

[wichita-kansas.livejournal.com]

Oh. Okay then.

HE'S LIKE THE LEAST INTIMIDATING PERSON EVER. ...In theory. :|

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Shhshhshh. I'm thinking it over.

YOU PUT A SNAKE IN HER ROOM BRO. SHE'S LIKE INDIANA JONES.

[wichita-kansas.livejournal.com]

IT ALWAYS HAS TO BE SNAKES. :|

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Okay! I'll bite. Where on this Love Boat would you put a semi-deity with a preternatural impulse to beat jackasses all to hell who only looks like the guy who got beat up a lot in high school?

WHERE'S MY HAT?

[wichita-kansas.livejournal.com]

You know what you need? You need to get laid. How about you start the first Barge brothel? Maybe one day you can graduate to pimp.

HE COULD GET HER A HAT. And a whip. SHE COULD BEAT INMATES IN ZERO WITH IT.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Damn. You figured out my five-year plan. Now I'm gonna have to go back to the drawing board and start over.

If they ever become BFFs, this is my new plan.

[wichita-kansas.livejournal.com]

What? Are you trying to be a secret pimp? Just 'cause the word's out doesn't mean you can't start the brothel. I need some action myself.

WHOO.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Maybe I wanted it to be a surprise, but now the jig's up.

[wichita-kansas.livejournal.com]

Too bad! Aw!

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Joke's on you. You're the one who doesn't get the benefits of the brothel.

[wichita-kansas.livejournal.com]

Guess I won't need that STD test after all.

[cantrunfromme.livejournal.com]

Hit it on the nail.

Can I go home yet?

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

What's the matter, Aly? Don't wanna be a real boy?