001 (Voice)

[uberboned]

[While the Winchesters are away, the Tricksters will play, apparently. THE BARGE HAS TIMING. :| Hope your ears love the sultry sound of loud-mouthed demigods/archangels with slight southern drawls, residents of the Barge, because that's what you're getting. And there is nothing in the tone of this that does not scream SNARK.]

GOOD MORNIN', VIET-NAM.

Or afternoon. Or, for all I know, half-past midnight. I don't believe in clocks. Anyway. 

Hi! I'm the newest sherrif on this Love Boat. One of you lucky sons of bitches will eventually be mine to mold into whatever amounts to a productive, functional member of society. Lucky you! For the rest of you, juuust get used to the sound of this voice, kids, 'cause you're gonna be hearing a lot of it. 

I could go on, tell you all a few things about me, and we can all have a nice, little sharing circle, buuuut I'm not that kinda guy. Sorry. A man's gotta have a little mystery about him. In this case, a lot. 

But, hey, I'm here for all you losers. That's the deal I made and I live up to my deals. Think of me as your own personal pagan deity. So if you really need and/or want me, look me up sometime. It's Trickster, comma, the. Thank you and good night. 

Comments

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

....There are actually people who don't? C'mon. You'd have to blind, deaf, and a moron to not see the levels of dysfunction there.

[yousethimfree.livejournal.com]

Dysfunction is a hunter's paradise. The barge isn't much better.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Lucky me. I thrive in dysfunction. And where there are egos to topple, I'm the one tipping over the dominoes.

I think me and this place are gonna get along swell.

[yousethimfree.livejournal.com]

So there's a method to the madness. I can respect that.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

I think the Admiral woulda had me clapped in irons if I tried to cut a deal and there wasn't.

So. My mutual friend in Winchester-periphery, which by the way ain't the best place to be on a good day and I'm sure you know that, what am I supposed to call you?

[yousethimfree.livejournal.com]

[Ruby questions if she should give a fake name. She'll be found out soon enough, but maybe it's worth it...]

Kristy.

[It's not lying. He didn't ask for a name, just something to call her.]

I hearby dub this post, "Ze post full of lying liars who lie about their names."

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[Sneaky, sneaky Ruby.]

Nice to meet someone from the ol' homestead then, Kristy.

Ze most awesome post ever.

[yousethimfree.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I just wish I had something to call you, other than Trickster. It's kinda impersonal.

I'm sitting here laughing my ass off. My God, kids.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

You can call me Skip, if it makes you feel better. I always kinda wanted to be the demigod otherwise known as Skip.

Life w/out Winchesters = Funtiems for all!

[yousethimfree.livejournal.com]

Skip. I like it.

FOR THE NEXT THIRTEEN HOURS, WE PARTY.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Eh. It suits me.

[yousethimfree.livejournal.com]

I'd ask if you wanted to get a drink, but inmates can't get up there without a warden, and I wouldn't expect you to trust me right off.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Pfft. What're you gonna do? Shank me? I ain't exactly brimming with frality here, precious. Does your warden usually let you out for drinks with strange demigods?

[yousethimfree.livejournal.com]

Shanking sounds fun. But really, I don't have a lot of restrictions put on me. I like what little freedom I've got, so I don't cause a lot of trouble. At least not anything punishable.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Okay. So. Drinks?

Spam? No time for logging.

[yousethimfree.livejournal.com]

Drinks. Meet you on deck.

You got it. AND MOST AWKWARD MEETING EVER IS A GO.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[The things one couldn't shake about being a friggin' archangel boiled down to the unnecessary attention to details. The minute Gabe hit this joint, he knew where everything was- made it easier to flit back and forth between locations... Which meant he was waiting on deck a good while, leaning against a wall casually. Angel speed- very speedy.]

YAY!

[yousethimfree.livejournal.com]

[Maybe it was a good while for him, but Ruby lives only a level below deck. Between a change of clothes, a quick mirror check and actually getting there, it was just a few minutes.

And when she got there? Oh could she smell the angel juice.

She smirked at him, knowing she'd just found out something he didn't want spread around. After all, why would an angel hide behind a pagan identity?]

Trickster, huh, Skip? Your family must be pleased as punch.

Annnd we're spamming.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[And hello, demon. Strictly speaking, Gabe looks shocked for all of three seconds before he settled somewhere between amused and oh-fuck-I-thought-I-could-hold-this-together-for-longer. He manged to do it for thousands of years. Yeah, that was the worst part of this. Not the demon thing. If he got offended by a demon, he hasn't looked hard enough at himself in the mirror too recently.

He held up his hands in some vague gesture of peace, smirking.]

My teenage rebellion got out of hand, Kristy. How's your daddy these days? Oh right. In the middle of the freakin' Apocalypse- the business trip that keeps on giving.

Spamming is awesome.

[yousethimfree.livejournal.com]

[Ruby crossed her arms. She wasn't quite over the Lucifer thing, but she was together enough to let that comment roll off her.]

Daddy can crawl back in his hole where he belongs. [Okay, not exactly roll off.] So how about we stop playing games. You tell me who you really are, I'll tell you who I really am.

[Spam]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[Gabriel lowered his arms, bringing up an eyebrow. There could have been more of a reaction to that. God knows that any comment about his family won't roll off his back as easily as he'd like it to. Thankfully, he held it together. Score one for his ability to hide.]

Gabriel. Okay? And I know it's kinda hard to ask a demon to do any favors for a friggin' archangel, but I'm trying to keep that on the downlow here. [Eyeroll.] Celebrity status and all that. I hate signing autographs.

[Yeah, because that's the real reason.]

[Spam]

[yousethimfree.livejournal.com]

[The laughter couldn't be avoided.] An archangel. You know we had one of those here not too long ago. Michael, I think his name was? I don't know, it was a flood, and I wasn't really myself.

[Spam]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[And, in true Gabriel fashion, he was just going to react to that the same way he reacts to everything- with a smarmface. Inside, he's twitching. Violently.]

If the pagan deity get-up didn't tip you off already, precious, I ain't exactly in Michael's Top Five. So if you're looking for righteous archangel fury and divine retribution, you met the wrong angel for drinks.

[Spam]

[yousethimfree.livejournal.com]

[She shrugged.] Hakuna matata.

[She gave him a quick once over, using just her eyes. She trusted he was telling the truth about himself. She didn't feel compelled to give up the truth about herself just from that, but considering this from all angles, it would probably be better to just come out with it.]

I'm Ruby. That Ruby.

[Spam]

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

[Of course she was, because of all the demons in all the world, the one that manipulated Sammy-Boy would be the one on this Barge. (Wait until he hears about Alastair.) Apparently, it wasn't as easy getting away from it all as he'd been led to believe.

Whatever. He shrugged right back.] It's our problem-free philosophy. And if I weren't retired from the whole Apocalypse thing, I'd probably be pissed at you about now, but what-the-heck-ever. The Barge will not sink. The Apocalypse rages on back home. And all I'm thinkin' right now is whether or not the bar serves those giant blue margarita things.