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008: FORCED OUT OF THE ANGEL CLOSET. THANKS, ADMIRAL.
[SO GABE'S A LITTLE ANNOYED, considering, you know, the Admiral revealed his ~~secret identity~~ and all that and Max is pissed at him. So here, Barge, have a grumpy archangel, officially coming out of the angel closet.]
OKAY. I GET IT. For the five people who didn't pay attention to the Admiral's announcement, yes, I'm actually Gabriel. Yep. That one. If the halo fits and all that. And y'know, there was a perfectly good reason for the deception, 'cause I don't like going around telling people I'm an archangel. It's a personal thing and not a "let's play a massive joke on the Barge to see if they'll buy it" thing. Okay? Okay.
And before I get a hundred questions about the same damn thing, lemme clear some stuff up for you guys.
1. Yes, I have wings. My vessel, unfortunately, does not, so no you can't see them, unless you're not that fond of your eyes.
2. I have never, in my entire billions of years in existence, had Shirley temple curls. Okay?
3. The Virgin Mary has a wicked right cross. True story.
4. No, you don't get to know why I'm pretending to be a Trickster. That information's on a need to know basis, and, look at that! You people don't need to know.
Hope that clears everything up.
OKAY. I GET IT. For the five people who didn't pay attention to the Admiral's announcement, yes, I'm actually Gabriel. Yep. That one. If the halo fits and all that. And y'know, there was a perfectly good reason for the deception, 'cause I don't like going around telling people I'm an archangel. It's a personal thing and not a "let's play a massive joke on the Barge to see if they'll buy it" thing. Okay? Okay.
And before I get a hundred questions about the same damn thing, lemme clear some stuff up for you guys.
1. Yes, I have wings. My vessel, unfortunately, does not, so no you can't see them, unless you're not that fond of your eyes.
2. I have never, in my entire billions of years in existence, had Shirley temple curls. Okay?
3. The Virgin Mary has a wicked right cross. True story.
4. No, you don't get to know why I'm pretending to be a Trickster. That information's on a need to know basis, and, look at that! You people don't need to know.
Hope that clears everything up.
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THE FACEPALM HEARD 'ROUND THE WORLD.
Re: THE FACEPALM HEARD 'ROUND THE WORLD.
...GO BACK TO YOUR OWN STUPID COUNTRY. Seriously. Stop fucking up the airwaves with your stupid slang.
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But he also doesn't run around sounding like his throat is a half bred lawn mower or screaming BAAAAAAAAAAALLLLS at the top of his lungs.
It wouldn't hurt you to be normal. Some people will never even reach that point... like Gabe here, but you have a chance. Don't waste it, dude.
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Where I'm from, I'm perfectly normal. Where I'm from, you're also more than a bit of twat.
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Holy Crap! This weird guy from the future just called me a twat! I am just shaking in my hunting boots and begging for judgment day.
NOTHING is worse than a computer geek in a mood swing.
...Grow up. I'm a dick, yeah, it's front page news. And headlining with a little editorial is 'Extra Extra The Archangel Gabriel? Also a dick.'
What can I say... [Dottity dot dot moment before turning to voice.] GURL. AW HELLS NAW. HE DID NOT JUST BE DISSIN MY HOMELAND ALL TOUGH AND SHIT... HOLD MY WEAVE I'M ABOUT TO BRING THE HEAT TO THIS BITCH.
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Your intoxicated aptitude's left me a bit wanting, so I'm gonna go ahead and leave it at that.
more voice
voice
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Stay out of my religion! My mum would've dropped over dead if she was here to see this!
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