uberboned | 005: Little toooown, it's a quiet village....

[Transmission clicks on mid-rant, because he meant to turn the damn thing on, but got distracted by a wayward Cupid. Those little things are pesky. :|]

-little sparkly freak. Annnd the light's blinking. For those of you watching at home, I didn't dropkick Cupid, but I'm about ten seconds from it. You think that would offend the locals? ....I wonder what they do to criminals in this town. I'm not really seeing this as being the hang 'em high kinda place. Unless the nooses are made of licorace or something. Geez. It's like the Valentine's section at a department store exploded. Or we docked in a Disney movie and, by the way? If anyone breaks into song, I'm... No, I'm actually probably gonna laugh and consider the Admiral worthy of my undying respect.

Also, I'm offended at this place's complete disregard for anything other than traditional couples. If this is the love port, you'd think there'd be a lot more orgies. Woodstock was better at free love than this joint and a heckuva lot less cheesy. C'mon.

Anyway. Maxxie, Rubes, Deano, JD, John-Boy, Ringo... Whoever else is out there bored out of their skulls and wandering listlessly around this joint with nothing to do... As soon as I take care of some business in the casino, I'm parking it at the bar and am not moving an inch until we leave. Wild horses covered in pink flowers will not drag me from that place, but hot local girls might.

[OOC: And by "take care of something in the casino," he means "harrass the patrons." A LOT OF GAMBLERS ARE DICKS, OKAY? Feel free to spam, comment, do whatever you want. He has a date with Max and Ruby (not simultaneously), at some point, and a make-out session with Irene, but I'm still all open for plotting if anyone wants it. I am flexible like that.]

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Beats me.

Oh well. Guess it wasn't important. [He shrugged, laughing a bit.] So. You gonna be okay? This is me, being a guardian angel. It's... Not really a look for me, but what the heck? Hard to resist a cute demon in distress.

[Oh God, he's making her blush again.] I'll be okay...if there's sex. There's sex, right?

[SUDDEN GLEEFACE IS INTERRUPTED BY SUDDEN QUESTIONING.] ...With me or in general?

With you. Duh.

Then yes. You do. [And because waiting is for losers and the town's just that sappy and because he just can, he leans down and kisses her.]

[Mustnotmeltintoapuddle, mustnotmeltintoapuddle. Okay, so she melts a little, but quickly recovers and wraps her arms around him as she returns his kiss.]

[He will totally ignore the melting or, rather, file it under 'things he is not using for blackmail material. He pulls away before things start getting indecent.] Right. As much as this town approves of free love, I'm pretty sure there are laws against taking this any further right here.

[She smiles, and even laughs a little.] Yeah, probably.

[Insert awesome hot demon-on-angel sex log that no one gets to see here. USE YOUR IMAGINATIONS, PEOPLE. DID BARNEY THE DINOSAUR TEACH YOU NOTHING?

...ABOUT PORN?]

[LOL, BARNEY.

Right, so no more sex, but there's after-sex cuddling. Cause Ruby is totally a cuddler when she's in love, which means this will probably never happen again. Add a satisfied sigh and waaaaay too many floating hearts and you get the picture.] I've been touched by an angel. I can die happy. ...again.

[BARNEY IS NECESSARY FOR EVERY SEX SCENE. EXCEPT NOT. BECAUSE THAT'S CREEPY.

Gabe has one arm folded behind his head and another around Ruby, totally facilitating the cuddling, because he is, apparently, also a cuddler. Tell no one. He will never admit it.] You're welcome. I'm pretty sure Dad's never letting me back in the house after this one, buuut I'm not too broken up about it.

[She snorts.] Your dad even at the house?

[Pause.] Not at the moment. Not sure where he is. [He shrugged.] So I guess what he don't know don't get me cast into the pits.

Yeah. [Family's probably not the best thing to talk about, even though she's damn curious. A change of subject is in order.] Thanks for not being an ass.

Don't tell anyone. I have my reputation to think of.

Haven't ruined it yet. [Thoughtful pause.] At least I don't think so.

[Mostly teasing.] Good, because it's a very well-deserved reputation that I've been building for... I dunno, thousands of years, and I'd hate to see it all fall apart.

[Ruby laughs softly.] I love you. [She pauses as she realizes what just came out of her mouth, but she laughs again, though this time it's embarrassed laughter.] Ignore that. I don't really mean it.

Hm. You said something? [Griiin.]

[A little louder, and actually playful.] I love you and I wanna have a castle and two little abominations. And a dog. Oh, and ogres for neighbors. Really, ogres are awesome. They're so unappreciated.

[And he's cackling.] I think the only ogres would be the kids. I'm just imagining the logistics and it's brain-breaking.

Yeah, you're right. Besides, I already have a cat, and a Serena van der Woodsen. The ogres may be a little much.

005: Little toooown, it's a quiet village....

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spam! AND WE CAN ASSUME SEX HAPPENED? As I have major SEX fail. :\

spam! SURE! There's no fail in assuming :)

spam! YEP. :D

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