020- (Voice) Gabe is still the most unhelpful angel on the Barge

[uberboned]

Okay! So everyone's getting a bit twitchy over this whole 'we're trapped on a boat with a bunch of starving vampires' thing. I get it. We all look like meals on wheels to you bloodsuckers right now, but just remember that people are friends not food. Repeat it to yourself. Cross-stitch it onto a pillow. I bet some of you guys could use the distraction right now. Go ahead. Cross-stitch away. It's a great hobby.

And, for the record, drinking angel blood is like drinking Drain-o. So don't try it... Unless you want to be hungry and convulsing on the floor with killer indigestion. Hah! See what I did there? 'Cause it... Never mind.

[Private to Max, added later.]

I'm coming over. I need to talk to you. And you don't get to say no.

Comments

[evilbystatute.livejournal.com]

Alright, I'll squash you in the first one, too. You're not getting the second unless you show me a doctorate.

[subtlescience]

You need a doctorate from me to know if I'll be eaten before you?

[evilbystatute.livejournal.com]

Yes. That's exactly how it works.

[subtlescience]

I was under the impression that the only important piece of information was which of us could run faster - and possibly build a better furniture barricade.

[evilbystatute.livejournal.com]

And the fact that I am overly qualified in a type of magic which specialises in the undead counts for nothing? I'd have thought that was a large factor.

Snape is bemused and amused at the same time.

[subtlescience]

I had no idea this had become a competition.

[evilbystatute.livejournal.com]

Less competition and more academic one-up-manship with a hint of survivalism. This is basically our University in a nutshell.

[subtlescience]

I concede this round to you. I can hardly compete by your University's standards if I've not attended your university.

[evilbystatute.livejournal.com]

Well, you could hold me to your school's standards at some time. I doubt a necromancer really fits in too well there, but you wouldn't really fit in ours, so we're even.

[subtlescience]

I wonder sometimes if Hogwarts had standards.

[evilbystatute.livejournal.com]

...They seemed to be quite liberal, from what I read, but I won't comment.

The Bursar alone is enough to condemn our university's standards.