uberboned | IC CONTACT POST

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[what] contact post

IC CONTACT POST

[A woman's voice comes over the line.]

You've reached the Trickster's voicemail. Unfortunately, Mr. Trickster isn't available to take your call, nor will he likely ever be. Should you still wish to leave a message, please respond after the tone, and maybe we'll remember to get it to him, mmkay?

[Beep]

[[OOC: This is an IC voicemail post for all verses games. Please put the name of the verse/game you want in the subject heading.]]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Gabriiiiieeeeeeeeeeeel. We're on a bridge, Gaaaaaabriiiieeeeeeel~!

[Painkillers plus a margarita. Enjoy this.]

[GROOOAN] I'm gonna put helium in your morphine.

[L O L]

I sound ridiculous on helium.

So, there's kind of something missing in my life. A distinct lack of troll angels bugging the shit out of me.

Obviously, you haven't spent enough time on the internet just yet. Call me when you've found the end. And while you're there? Do a Google search for the marginal sanity Sam Winchester has, 'cause I think someone's selling it on Craigslist.

[Nnngh.]

Why would you pick that day to talk to him? [Guess who supposedly doesn't know about the prayer. DX ] I thought you weren't into easy targets.

He prayed and this? This is why people thank God for unanswered prayers. How the hell was I supposed to know he was on drugs? [...He did his research. And by research, I mean he watched the unfiltered feeds from that entry and had a working brain.]

Oh. He- [Tense sigh.]

Let me guess. He yelled at you for twenty minutes and it was a total shit-show.

[SO DRY] How'd you guess?

Well.

Thoughts?

Why does he think you're taking the fall for me? Last I heard, Lucifer was stalking you because you're a prophet and that makes him hot and bothered.

I don't know, I mean, all I told him was the situation and that someone had to tell Lucifer. I guess he interpreted that a lot worse than it is.

It's Sam. He doesn't exactly have a hard-on for me.

Well Jesus, can you fucking blame him?

You wrote Mystery Spot. Did you happen to get it from my perspective? That wasn't all sundaes and soda pop for me.

[Pause.]

Yeah, Gabriel. I know. I don't know if you know this, but I could write a dissertation about you.

That's not really my point.

...I don't know whether that's flattering or creepy.

[LE SIGH] Then what, oh capricious one, is the point?

Ask the weirdos who sent me the visions.

[Lip bite.]

You're not drunk enough for this conversation, but sure.

What would you do if someone killed Lucifer in front of you?

I know why the kid's pissed at me, Chuck. That doesn't mean I didn't have a good reason for doing it. If he'd put two and two together, he would've figured that one out.

How many times, Gabriel? How many times would it take before you went completely batfuck insane and became just as obsessed with finding the son of a bitch and making him hurt as badly as you did?

He doesn't care if you had motivations.

Just- imagine. Lucifer. The way he used to be? Before- I don't know, before Hell? Just. Over and over and over, and you couldn't do anything about it. Seeing him die, hearing his screams and seeing the lights go out hundreds- thousands of times.

You put him in his own personal Hell. You're his Alastair. As long as he sees you that way, you gotta deal with his crazy.

[Long, long silence.

HE HATES IT WHEN PEOPLE ARE RIGHT. It sucks.

He'll be with you in a moment, he just has to sort his entire life out and repress like a boss.]

[Pause.]

Why don't you come on over?

Why not? You still owe me cotton candy vodka.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, cool. This is kind of a vodka conversation anyway, don't you think?

...Yeah, Chuck. I think.

[BAM. ANGEL IN THE HOUSE... And rifling in the gifts for the vodka.] You should know, I think Sam's on drugs... and not the usual drugs. The other kind.

[Hanging up the NV now, thanks, and gesturing at the big cabinet right over there.]

That's the bar.

[Cough.] You- you mean, uh, street drugs? Like a normal person?

That's... unexpected. [He isn't the best liar in the world. Sam totally told him.]

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