uberboned | IC CONTACT POST

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[what] contact post

IC CONTACT POST

[A woman's voice comes over the line.]

You've reached the Trickster's voicemail. Unfortunately, Mr. Trickster isn't available to take your call, nor will he likely ever be. Should you still wish to leave a message, please respond after the tone, and maybe we'll remember to get it to him, mmkay?

[Beep]

[[OOC: This is an IC voicemail post for all verses games. Please put the name of the verse/game you want in the subject heading.]]

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It's not me I'm worried about.

Sam won't need much convincing to lay off of a kid that everyone thinks is a monster through no fault of its own. Trust me. That'll do you for a good five months, right? Yeah, and as for her- look, all someone has to do is put it in terms he'll understand. If framed like that, then hurting her wouldn't really be an option.

[Sigh] You're the prophet.

Yep.

Now- that's a bunch of my vodka that you're not drinking. So... [So make an honest drink out of it or give it back. :( ]

[Gabriel stares at it, takes a swig and then tosses it over.] Protip? Invest in schnapps.

[Catching it easily and taking the smallest sip.]

I used to just steal them, but now? I mean, vodka's more efficient.

And tastes like peppermint lighter fluid.

Pansy.

I think there are some sour apple schnappes in the fridge, and Hpnotiq in the freezer. That's fruity enough for you, right?

Your BAC is more alcohol than blood, Hemingway. [Which is to say that Gabriel will be finding the sour apple schnapps with... Something that vaguely resembles gratitude.]

Hemingway? That's a compliment. Drop the M-bomb and I think we'd have a problem.

Please. Stephanie Meyer hasn't drank herself to death... Yet.

When I start writing psychologically masochistic cry for help wet dreams, we'll know I've crossed into the final Mormon dimension.

Please. You already do. They're just not your wet dreams.

Wait, are Sam and Dean's lives secretly metaphors for my deep-seated unhappiness with my Mormon lifestyle? That's news to me.

More like it's Sam and Dean's Mormon lifestyles you oughta be worried about. You're the conduit. Meyer doesn't really doesn't have the "BTW I'm a prophet" excuse.

You never know. Maybe Renesmee was a seal.

The fact that you actually know the kid's name concerns me.

I read this cracked-out breakdown of the series once after someone left a six-pack of Four Loko at my house. It's kind of a memorable name.

And unpronounceable. If being a vampire with a future hubby twice her age didn't scar that kid, trying to write that crap on her Kindergarten nameplate would.

Uh, excuse you, their pedophile love was beautiful.

[

]

And taught a generation of young girls that it's okay if the creepy older man watches you play while you're a toddler- he could totally be your future husband. Humbert Humbert's come a long way.

At what point does she become an acceptable Trickster target?

Who do you think leaked Midnight Son?

[ ...

Brb, laughing forever.]

Without me, we would've had to sit through another three books, plus another three just to get Jacob's side, and probably another hundred to cover the perspectives of all the minor characters.

I single-handedly saved the literary world.

(no subject)

paterelohim - 2011-09-02 02:55 (UTC) - Expand

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