uberboned | IC CONTACT POST

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[what] contact post

IC CONTACT POST

[A woman's voice comes over the line.]

You've reached the Trickster's voicemail. Unfortunately, Mr. Trickster isn't available to take your call, nor will he likely ever be. Should you still wish to leave a message, please respond after the tone, and maybe we'll remember to get it to him, mmkay?

[Beep]

[[OOC: This is an IC voicemail post for all verses games. Please put the name of the verse/game you want in the subject heading.]]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Keep on and they'll throw you in solitary, babe. Nothing sexy about that. [Except the way he's making it sound...]

[She begins to reply, but the phone receiver is yanked away from her. There's a lot of bitching as she isn't handcuffed again. No. This time, they put zip ties on her. Finally, she gets the phone back.]

As I was saying--there's no such thing as solitary in jail. I asked. And this Void is stalking me, so no way you can just teleport here and...you know...

Give 'em a piece of my mind? [Among other things...] Maybe I'll stand outside the station and sing "Please Mr. Jailer." That's even better than money.

[She sighs. It's time to start taking this seriously.]

Or you could go into the kitchen for me.

And then? [He may or may not have already been in the kitchen. Eating frosting. What?]

[sjklfghgjks]

You didn't even fly there, did you? You were already there. You were eating while hitting on me in jail, weren't you?

[HE SOUNDS SO HURT.] Well, if you didn't get arrested, I wouldn't have to lick frosting off a butter knife. There's still have a container though. We could make this work. But, you know, only if you let me in on your secret plan.

[Monotone:] You're not using a knife. You're licking it off your finger. I know you are.

...All the butter knives were dirty.

[She's about to make a snide comment, but her attention wanders. Her voice lowers.]

If we microwave the frosting for a few seconds, do you think we could drizzle it on me?

Or I could just get hot fudge.

[She makes a very pleased sound, getting completely off track.]

Really hot fudge?

Straight from the fondue pot. Didn't I tell you? We have a fondue pot now.

Don't tell the boys. We'll keep it upstairs in our bedroom.

After what I plan to use it for, I don't think they'll want it. Hell of a good use for a wedding gift.

Details, 'briel. Come on. Don't hold out on me...

[It's like she's forgetting where she is completely. She's even ignoring the officer's shouting.]

Wouldn't you rather I did it in person? I can use visual aides.

I'll be home in like ten--

[That's when it dawns on her.]

...I'm incarcerated. And I'm not a supervillain anymore.

Only when we're really kinky, but that don't usually involve robbing banks. Want me to come down there now?

[She nearly gets distracted by sex again, but she forces herself to stay on topic.]

I need you to dig through the back of the freezer for me.

You can't just hide things under the mattress, can you? [RIFLE, RIFLE. OMG IT'S SO COLD... Oh wait, he... Does not really register temperatures. It's still wet.]

I never know if the mattress is going to stay put. [A beat.] Hey, remember that time we broke my old bed?

[Focus. What is it.]

[Dreamily.] That was awesome. [A pause.] Jinx. I'm getting frostbite over here.

It was...

[Oh. Right. Reality.]

Uh, there should be a block of ice wrapped in tinfoil back there. It's about the size of a book.

[Long pause.] Why is there a block of ice wrapped in tinfoil in the back of our freezer and will it bite me?

IC CONTACT POST

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